Tuesday, July 15, 2014

love lost and hope found....

I met an older gentleman at work last week and during our conversation he said 3 years ago his wife of 53 years had died suddenly. After giving my condolences regarding her death I said "wow, that is a long time" speaking of their years of marriage. And he corrected me, "no, it isn't" and he smiled. How right he was. In this day and age for a marriage to last 53 years is such a huge accomplishment, but in the grand scheme of things 53 years together was simply not enough.

On my recent trip to Europe, I stumbled upon a lovely walking bridge in Frankfurt, Germany. All the way down both sides of the bridge locks of love are placed with names and dates of marriage or initials of lovers. And suddenly something struck me; that hope for love is still somewhere inside of me. For a few years now I have been fearful of love. Aside from a year long relationship in 2013 with a great man who was before,and always will be a amazing friend, I have not been in a relationship or even really open to the idea of one. I finally realized that I am overwhelmed with fear. Not only of being hurt, but honestly the fear I have most is in hurting another person again. The hope I had lost was not in love itself, but in me and my own ability to love, to really really love again.

On this same trip I met a couple in their 70's and they have been together for 25 years. It made me realize that they had not even met or began their relationship until they were in their 40's. That gave me hope as well. Hope that love is still a possibility for me, that I may find someone to share a life with.
Being open to the idea of it is a huge a step for me, and admitting it out loud is an even bigger step.

Love lost....Hope found....

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